What a summer, an intoxicating cocktails of pain, joy, happiness and plain frustation.

And I do feel worn down a bit, of all the activities demanded of me; while I'm searching for a safe house with a door that will open. I still have quite a vast repository of strength I can tap into from time to time, although I wonder if it can get replenished in time.

It downs on me that it's not easy being young, trying to build a future that you can be proud of when are you old. That's why we are blessed with youthful energy, body and ideas. That's just the price of entry.

I found myself from time to time feeling envious for what my other friends have build for themselves, safe careers and a nest of comfortable life. Not the kind of life I would happy to be in, but I would bet  theirs are less chaotic and messy than mine. But off course the don't get to be an Empire Builder.

Two friends wondered yesterday about why I write a weblog, sharing stream of conciousness out in the open, unedited and uncensored.

Well, I do it to save keep my own sanity, trying to make sense my own reality.  Others have their loved ones to keep them straight, I have none immediately reachable. Others uses booze and drugs to fight their demons, I don't have such luxury. I rely on words to keep me company. Such a crazy notion, but then again, I left the comfort of home since I was 13 and ever since I've tried to rebuilt my home whenever fate takes me (4 continents so far)

This is also how I keep in touch with friends around the world that I will never have enough time to interact with, succumbing to the tirany of geography and ticking clock. And each of my friend will take something different from what I write here, personalized through the bond we have created. I'm sending loves in bytes and its realized through the imagination of beautiful minds. Thank you.